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Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Rough Week

We have had a pretty rough week around our house to say the least, so this post is a little long.
Late Thursday my mom was admitted into the ER due to shortness of breath. After a long night in the
hospital, many tests, and no findings she was discharged home. She has a follow up visit on the 14th with a Cardiologist. We hope to get some insight soon. We are grateful she is home and doing well. Scotty made sure to bring his Nana some flowers to cheer her up that were just about as big as him! Nana loved them.

My "morning sickness" which really only happens in the evening is still in full swing. It is starting to get, well annoying. I am ready to feel somewhat “normal” (as normal as a pregnant woman can feel) again soon! I am also still so exhausted. I look around my house and feel like there is so much that needs to be done, but I just can't seem to do it. I am barely getting the necessities completed. Laundry takes days to complete. Groceries are not getting bought, and no meals are being prepared. My hair and make-up, well they are things of the past these days! I feel so guilty when I just can't be super mom/wife and do it all, especially when it comes to my sweet Scotty because he doesn’t understand. Lately, he has really had to depend more on dad. It hasn't been easy on anyone so we are hoping things get better soon especially since next week marks my first week of my second trimester. Thanks honey for your continued help and support. Our next U/S is next week the 24th. Can’t wait to see our new addition…boy or girl? Next month.

Now to the extremely rough part of the week…

Late Saturday evening, my dad called about taking Bella into the ER. I instructed them on what to do, and they took her in. We didn’t think too much about it. Maybe she had eaten something bad etc. Nothing too major, but nevertheless she needed to be seen. When I woke up Sunday, I immediately wanted to check on Bella. I called my mom and through her tears Bella all of a sudden, common in her breed, had neurologic damage and is now unable to walk. I just threw her ball on Friday. She loved to play ball, run, and jump. She was so fast too. Seems the very things she loved most, besides her family as all dogs do, cost her a short life.

It was either a non-gauranteed back surgery to try and correct the problem or it was putting her to sleep. It seems so unfair to one day have a healthy loving young dog (her 6th birthday was coming up ) and the next you are faced with such a difficult decision. The guilt of either decision is great and if you are lucky enough to have the love of a dog you love them as part of your family. They love you unconditionally and they depend on you for everything. What a tough decision. At the end of the day after talking through all the variables, many prayers, tears, discussions with the vet, my parents had to make a very tough non-selfish decision to put our sweet girl to sleep. It was a hard day. We did a lot of crying and a lot of questioning. She will be buried in Missouri on our friends farm next to our dog Little Bit. What a perfect place.

Life was so unfair on that day.

We love you Bella and we will miss you and love you always. Thanks for being so good to all of us. We got to spend a few last hours with her at home. Some pictures below.

Dear Scotty,
Bella loved you very much and was always so sweet to you. She kissed you every morning when you got to your Nana and Papa’s house. She made sure you were always taken care of, and we nicknamed her “dog mom”. You used to tease her with her bear and ball. This morning when you came in to the house you called for her twice, and she never came. I wish you could understand where she is now. Unfortunately, you probably won’t remember her, but you guys were dear friends. Love, Mom.

Xoxo,

The Zuehlke's




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